We were never meant to do this alone…

Once, when I was in college I thought I was going to drown. The world tumbled on top of me, memeories of past traumas were seeping into the cracks of my carefully constructed present self and nothing felt right. It was hard to eat, impossible to sleep, and I didn’t even know where to begin to heal. I didn’t even recognize myself anymore. I fought hard and tried to maintain the appearance of stability, but that was totally and utterly futile. One day, after a dance class, my professor came to and said “we were never meant to do this alone.” It was something a close friend had said to her in a time of great need. Something inside of me finally shattered. This idea that I had to be enough all the time by myself. That I had to be so self sufficient that I don’t need anyone to support me in any way.

we were never meant to do this alone.

That is why I teach. That is why I began to open my practice to being with others, and then began to offer what excites me and what little I have gleaned to anyone who is as hungry for wonder and transformation as I am. Thankyou for being a part of that.

May you be happy. May you be healthy. May you be free from all suffering. May you share your gifts with the world, and may you know your true self in this lifetime.

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Seeds of Transformation

Since I got pregnant it has been difficult to feel inspired by anything other than the work my body is doing at hand. My mind has little space to wander, I feel so focused and pragmatic. I miss feeling inspired and elated by the amazingness of the universe. Well, over the weekend, I heard this report about Moth memory, and it has inspired me all week. I wanted to share with you folks, because if you came to one of my classes this week, here is the actual background to what we talked about, and if you didn’t, you might still want to read about this, it is pretty inspiring.
I have a memory as a little girl of really needing to know what happened inside a cocoon. I imagined, like I think many of us do, that the caterpillar sort of grew a different shell, the sprouted wings and then would fly away when it was fully developed. So, I opened a cocoon. And there was just goo. It was like the caterpillar had melted into mush. Not only was I disappointed not to see a half formed butterfly or moth, I now had to live with the knowledge that I was a murderer.I killed a butterfly. I felt so guilty that I think I repressed this memory until I heard this report about butterflies and moths. What I didn’t know and just learned was that caterpillars and butterflies are actually two organisms in one. The caterpillar literally dies and dissolves into goo, and the butterfly who has totally different DNA turns on. (Eric Carle should definately revamp the Very Hungry Caterpillar with this information in mind!) You can read about the details here.
There are even really sweet illustrations.
So, caterpillars and butterflies are actually two organisms in one with two sets of DNA. The caterpillar dies in the cocoon and the butterfly actually is a new organism….sort of. The second part of this story, is that scientists have done more research to see if these creatures remember anything from their caterpillarhood. And apparently, they do, check it out here.
How do we engage with the process of transformation? Isn’t it sort of terrifying as we move from one state to the next. Where do our memories live? How can we be brave as we engage with this process?
And if you want to hear more about my thoughts as I’ve been mulling all of this over this week, join me in class tonight at Y2b Fit or saturday at Life Sport Fitness.

Expecting

It is getting real, folks. Baby is due in less than a month. Here is my September Schedule until the baby comes. All classes are Vinyasa Yoga unless otherwise marked.

Tuesday 4:45pm-6 pm at Bombay Yoga Co. (Hot Vinyasa), 6:30-7:30 pm at Life Sport Fitness.

Wednesday 7:30-8:30pm at Sweat Fitness, Fitler Square. 

Thursday: 10-11am atLife Sport Fitness. and 5:45-6:45 (Core Flow) at Y2b Fit.

Saturday: 10-11:30am at Life Sport Fitness.